I was wondering

I don't want to be in a relationship, just for the sake of being with someone, but I want someone to hold me, someone to kiss me, someone to miss me.
So I settle, knowing that I'm not strong enough, to just be alone.
You’d never guess that I've watched, I've waited, and I’ve wanted... only you.

I was wondering...
If you care?
If you want?
If you dream?
If you hurt?
If you know?
I was just wondering.

Do I kick myself for being such a coward or do I convince myself that we were probably never meant to be?
So much wasted time!
Sometimes I wonder if it's really you I fell for, or my idea of what I thought you were?
Whatever! No amount of red wine can change the fact that you were never really mine

I was wondering...
Why I care?
Why I want?
Why I dream?
Why I hurt?
Why I never let you know?
I was just wondering.

I've spent years wanting to be loved; by you. I thought that you were my “someone special”. I now see, that I had someone special all along, but didn't notice, cause I was too busy loving you… No more

.